All posts by spin345

Look Back in Anger

Rebecca Mott

The sex work lobby wants exited women to disappear into silence.

We will not, we will be loud, we will speak truth to power, we will not rest as we see the daily genocide of the prostituted.

Exited women are not meant to be here.

We are meant to be dead – or too damaged to speak out.

No-one is allowed to a witness to the conditions of prostitution.

That is the reality of how the sex trade has always worked, it destroyed all our humanity and power to express our truths.

But we are alive, we have keep our sanity, we are growing in our truth-speaking.

We know our past are the presents of far too many prostituted women and girls.

And we are angry.

We see and know the rooms, the streets, the brothels, the hotels, the flats, the cars, and endless sites that are prostituted Sisters are…

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Guest post: Why don’t more women in New Zealand’s sex trade advocate to criminalise pimps?

writing by renee

In 2003, the Prostitution Reform Act (PRA) was passed, introducing a policy of full decriminalisation of the sex trade to New Zealand. Under this model, women in prostitution are no longer criminalised, like they were previously; but neither are pimps or johns. The PRA decriminalised women by legitimising prostitution, accepting it as business, or “a job like any other”. Here, guest blogger Kate (whose real name is protected for safety reasons) talks about why more women in New Zealand’s sex trade do not advocate for the criminalisation of pimps and johns, but not prostituted women – this is known as the “Nordic Model”.

The most obvious reason more women in prostitution in this country aren’t advocating the Nordic Model, is that they’ve never heard of it. In the Auckland brothel where I’ve been sold for sexual use for over ten years, I have met hundreds of other women, there for…

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One for the Men: On Prostitution and Thankfulness

“Oh you’re different though. You’re not one of those feminists who hate men.”

Perhaps because my reputation as a sex-negative-man-hating-radical feminist sex-trade abolitionist- banshee precedes me, I often encounter this smiling, insistent comment/question half way through almost any conversation with someone new. Some men await confirmation with their eyes glancing towards the nearest exit, others however are already at mental rest, and need to be dissuaded of the comfortable notion that somehow I disapprove of women who do indeed hate men.

I don’t.

So now we’ve got that out of the way, I’m going to try and address something I find infuriating in experiencing women who are pro-prostitution or neutral about it who disingenuously use the “You’re a man, what would you know?” card on men who abhor the sex-trade.  By men who abhor the sex trade I don’t mean men who seek cookies for abstaining from using prostituted women and think they are exceptional for it-( lame-arse, self-aggrandising bores; not being a paying sexual abuser earns you exactly zero credit from my perspective and you’re probably lying anyway)- but those who actively fight against male entitlement to buy women and girls as sexual commodities.

hamburg

You see, a lot of men get a disproportionate amount of credit for simply not killing and raping and it is a bit tiresome to have to pat your son, husband, nephew,  uncle, boyfriend, friend or father on the head for the act of not behaving like a cuntless wonder.  But men who actively fight against the sex-trade are absolutely crucial to abolishing it because without male demand to end  paid sexual abuse in the form of prostitution and pornography (filmed prostitution), women like me would have no hope whatsoever of seeing the back of it or it’s apologists.

Put simply, if men stopped paying to sexually use us then all this trade in human beings for sexual access would stop , end, cease to exist.

Women who feign being insulted by women like me who call them out every time they insist prostitution is feminist tend to try and silence me with patronising or hostile dismissals or rebukes. Men sit back and enjoy us arguing.

But there is another way they try and do this and it is also very effective. They leap-frog me in conversation and go for the jugular of the nearest man who supports the abolition of the sex trade.

I am quite a fan of the “You’re a man, you have no right to discuss womens’ experience” charge. It’s accurate, and it is about as close to telling men to bugger off as I can get without threat of being physically attacked by them, especially if I do it from the distance of the blogosphere. That is quite telling of womens’ very real fear of being raped , beaten and murdered by men every minute of every day globally.

Yes, right now a man is buying a woman, a man is raping a woman, a man is beating a woman, a man is murdering a woman. Oh yawn, how dull. Can’t we make this reality a human right? Can’t we make this sexier? It is so boorrrrrrriing.

With that in mind I’m going to tell pro-prostitution women to stop using the important  actual necessity of telling men to bugger off when it comes to womens’ rights when they don’t give a shit themselves,  and to take their disingenuous arguments about men not having the right to speak about what men do to us, and shove it.

Women, if you are pro-prostitution you are not a feminist. So stop leap-frogging prostitution survivors and faking enthusiasm for women’s rights. You have no politics and no right to argue for our oppression as a class.

I mean what the actual fuck? Don’t even try to go straight to the men who refuse to buy us and organise against our purchase by using me as a platform to ignore. I may not like men very much but aren’t you a tad , bit, completely obnoxious to target them because you are afraid to target me? You have no argument that isn’t vacuous so it is easy to go for these men instead of me because I’ll pin your argument down and dismantle it and you know it.

You’ve got away with so much woman hating shit by being female that I’ve come to hate you (ideologically anyway) myself. But then, the material and psychological reality of living under patriarchy means that my hatred or even vague dislike of you is irrelevant because a whole lot of men will let you live and stroke your ego for standing up for them. It won’t stop them from abusing you in the long run, but it may keep you safe in the moment. I get it.

I mean I really get it. This is exactly what prostituted women must endure to stay alive in a world where appeasing men doesn’t guarantee our safety from male violence but in capitalist-patriarchy we cling to because it is easier to side with rapists and other entitled shits and call it a choice than it is to stop them.

There is nothing psychologically complex about this. How many times have you heard women over a coffee laugh at how stupid men are? How many times have we all had a giggle at men being like ‘children’? Too many times to count because we do it incessantly. Am I right?

It makes life endurable to laugh at men.   For example, I personally cringe at crude humour, but put me together with some of the smartest women I know- survivors of prostitution – and in no time we are cracking jokes about the men who have paid to rape us. It is incredibly human; this natural cohesion and cackling at the lowest common denominator. What is important to realise is that the prostituted are not the lowest, it’s the scum-bags who buy us who are.  We know this. Alone with a man we know he could easily bash us to death for laughing at him. Every woman knows this. Even capitulating to the use of hierarchical language such as “low” and “high” is a capitulation to structures of superiority but here we are. Surviving as best you can is a double-edged sword.

Allow me to show you a group of white self pro-claimed”sex workers” promoted by the BBC . Check out the snark, check out the eye-rolling and complete dearth of ethical responses to (some) genuine claims and queries in this cleverly grafted pro prostitution propaganda:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/bbcthree/item/af17c3e5-02aa-40ce-8d7f-ba57a07a934c

One would imagine that these are the real faces of prostituted women. It reminds me of the signs of smiling pigs and cows outside butcher shops. The chicken giving you the thumbs up to eat them.

Oh my, did I just equate “sex workers” with pigs, cows and chooks?

Why yes I did. How else do you think men who buy us think of us?

If you don’t think the way men think of us impacts on their choice to buy us you are bonkers.  Or perhaps, as happens in almost any other group of people,you are clinical narcissists. eg. One of the women in this clip defended her right to be a “sex worker” on the basis that she pays her taxes as if contributing to the GDP, which furthers the expansion of the sale of a class of people, is a good thing because she is choosing it for herself and this makes the sex-trade just fine because it isn’t harming her personally.

Well, I don’t subscribe to right-wing ideology. I don’t subscribe to Thatcherite-Reaganism and the oppression of the majority based on the applause of the few.

Apart from the complete lack of structural analysis- (the fact that decriminalising johns and pimps leads to the inevitable expansion of the sex-trade in those who do not want to be in it) – I could not care less how these “sex workers” earn a living. It is actually cringe-worthy how they think they are so risque, interesting and misunderstood. They are so unutterably boring it would be laughable if the sex-trade truly was harmless.

It’s laughable until you are trying to find a way out of prostitution and people keep shoving it down your throat that this is a job like any other. It is laughable until you realise that the lies you tell about orgasms  (above, I mean really, are you shitting me?) become the lies you tell not just the men who buy you (some of whom will beat you if you do orgasm by the way), but the lie you tell yourself and everybody else.  It is laughable and apparently so hilarious, to talk down to any one who asks questions about the reality of prostitution, roll your eyes at them, explain you are a professional “submissive” (not a real one- hahahaha) or dominatrix (who doesn’t have to be penetrated but gets to bash the shit out of men who like it- go you!). It’s laughable until you’ve been years in prostitution and the men stop paying for you unless the acts get more and more violent. It is laughable until you realise you still don’t have that flat you were saving for and no proper work experience any where else.

You can go into the fetish market of course. Women who are fucked while sleeping? Men who fetishise wrinkles and rolls? Men who want to fuck us when we are dressed as 2 year olds? Men who want our emotional energy and to be cuddled like babies while they chew our breasts and shit in diapers? Men who want to fuck their mothers and grandmothers but feel like they are sick for wanting to? Aw, poor men. Yes, it is disgusting wanting to fuck your mother or grandmother or daughter, but hey, it is so liberating for us prostituted women to tell you you are not repulsive fuckers. (You are disgusting, I hope you all die and soon because you are taking up invaluable space, but I won’t say that directly because at the moment you are bribing me with money to cover the fucking rent you arsehole.)

It is laughable until you realise that men can murder you with impunity.

It is laughable until you realise that a man who has raped you is not charged with rape but with “theft of service.”

So kudos to the men who do more than pay lip-service to abstention from buying and trading in us as sexual commodities.

I imagine I’d probably have a more sisterly conversation with the women in the sex-trade who insist they enjoy it, and the women who have no experience of it but claim it is all about a ‘woman’s right to choose’ than I would with these men who actively oppose the sex-trade because men do so often expect me to mollify their feelings of shame at being male as a class and I am not particularly inclined to mollify them.

But these men can take my word for it, yes I need you to stop buying us for sex and yes I insist you speak out against the sex-trade every single day to other men.

Thanks for that and keep it going.

As you can see, the pimp propaganda using self-proclaimed “sex workers” is effective. While women argue amongst ourselves and prostitution survivors like myself are leap-frogged in discussion, I DO expect nothing less of you than to keep going in the fight to end male entitlement and also for first-class exit strategies for women in prostitution. I insist on this even for the noxious, entitled types featured in this smarmy piece of shit propaganda above.

I really haven’t found anything to like about men as a class even though I like some as individuals. I will continue to dissuade men who are relieved that I don’t cut their balls off when I meet them that it is because somehow I think they have been hoodwinked or are innocent in all this. But my manners are generally okay and I’m frankly not a misanthropic kind of ‘girl’.

Big deal. You know what to do. End demand.

These socially unconscious and self-centred “sex workers”and me can handle our in-fight while you get on with the work of letting every man and boy,( disabled, poor, rich or otherwise), know that sex is not a human right and that money does not equal consent but circumvents it entirely, no matter how many pimp-funded leaflets, promos, banners, paid “sex worker” activists and documentaries tell you otherwise.

Thank you.  I really mean it. But as you can see I’ve still spent a lot of time having a go at other women about this so count yourself fucking lucky if you are a man.

I’ll keep fighting but only men can stop the sex-trade.

Sex, Gender, and the New Essentialism

Sister Outrider

A brief foreword: This is the first in a series of essays on sex, gender, and sexuality. If you agree with what I have written, that is fine. If you disagree with any of the following content, that is also perfectly fine. Either way, your life will go on undisturbed after you close this tab irrespective of what you think about this post.

I refuse to remain silent for fear of being branded the wrong type of feminist.  I refuse to remain silent as other women are harassed and abused for their views on gender. In the spirit of sisterhood, this post is dedicated to Julie Bindel. Our views may not always converge, but I am very glad of her work to end male violence against women. In the words of the late, great Audre Lorde: “I am deliberate and afraid of nothing.”


When I first enrolled as a Gender…

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Dear transactivists: stop no-platforming feminists

writing by renee

One of the key, stated motivations driving liberal transactivists is to end unjust violence and discrimination inflicted on a marginalised group: violence that should never be condoned. Many transactivists I know are community-minded liberals who want to make life easier for a minority group suffering discrimination – and that is fair enough.

I would be on board with this campaign, too, if it was not in actual fact so clearly focussed on attacking women; and if it did not pose such a huge, persistent and aggressive threat to women. Transactivism has to date been so effective in its silencing and bullying of women too, at taking down feminists whatever their public profile, that it also reveals itself as something much bigger and more sinister than a grassroots movement based on solidarity.

It also makes no sense to attack women, and feminists, if your ultimate concern is with gender-based violence…

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Male Violence – Masking the Agent

Reclaim the Night Perth, Australia

reclaimthenightperth2016

This is the speech given by Caitlin Roper, Campaigns Manager at Collective Shout, at the 2016 Reclaim the Night rally in Perth.

A domestic violence worker is found shot to death in her home in Victoria. A 21-year-old woman is stabbed 80 times after breaking up with her boyfriend. A Doubleview father douses his three young children in petrol and sets them alight. A five-year-old girl is sexually abused by an older family friend. A man walks into a school, movie theatre, or a crowded street, and starts shooting.

What do all of these seemingly isolated incidents have in common?

They are all examples of male violence.

Of course we rarely identify them as such. We use more neutral, watered down terms such as ‘domestic violence’, ‘family violence’, ‘violence against women’, ‘intimate partner violence’ or ‘gender-based violence’- all of which conveniently fail to recognize and name the perpetrators, without…

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The Untameable Shrews: Taking their Message to the Streets!

“The Untameable Shrews have taken over Melbourne and elsewhere, in a campaign to demand men stop the sexual exploitation of women.

In an unashamedly pro-woman campaign the “Shrews” have declared “Vulva La Revolution” and have been going viral sharing graffiti in the form of sticker-bombing.

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Last week they defied pimps, johns and pornographers at Melbourne’s Sexpo (or SLEAZEFEAST as the “Shrews’ call it). Melbourne has been named “the worlds’ most liveable city”. Liveable for whom? With a legal sex trade and advertising promoting brothels, strip clubs where the government profits from women’s sexual exploitation, it is not particularly liveable for women and girls.

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The Shrews started their journey tearing down and painting over  posters with a letter writing campaign to councils and local government.


Their street art involves paste ups, stickers and stencils using non-violent messages stating the facts about male violence against women, such as porn is sexual, verbal and physical abuse towards women by men. the Untameable Shrews do not accept that any violence against women is acceptable and insist that male violence is the single determining factor in such abuse.

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The “shrews” maintain that the irony of Sexpo happening on White Ribbon Australia Day is certainly not lost on them and hope that White Ribbon takes note of that. The Shrews have active members in Tasmania, Brisbane and the ACT, as well as New Zealand and Germany. They’re going global and have many upcoming national and international campaigns.

You can follow The “Shrews” here –  https://twitter.com/untamableshrews

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VULVA LA REVOLUTION INDEED!

Nightmare

“Nightmare” by Rebecca Mott

Rebecca Mott

Being exited is wonderful, but all the time there are triggers.

Usually I can deal with them, but this week a punter has written to my blog, and set off so much fear and memory of being nothing in me.

Maybe it coz of the depression of Brexit and Trump being elected.

Maybe it is my sleep pattern being all over the place.

Whatever it is, this particular punter and his arrogance has really got inside me.

He is called in his email painal4whores, isn’t that a charming start.

He choose to write to an exited woman how he loves raping and causes pain to the prostituted – knowing the police will turn a blind eye to his violence.

He goes on to say how he prefer to take advantage of poor prostituted women, especially if they have been robbed or own rent.

This charmer is not original, he is…

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Young Labor Didn’t Do it’s Homework

 

Tasmanian Labor’s agenda for it’s conference in Queenstown this weekend has promised an opportunity for ‘robust and spirited debate’.

http://www.themercury.com.au/news/politics/legalising-brothels-on-agenda/news-story/6dc2f4cee4526aaa96a71ba8d7da610b

While the decriminalisation of brothels and the legalisation of some illicit drugs are being proposed by two separate branches of the party, the coupling of both proposals is difficult to avoid.

A more cynical person would thank members of the Labor party for at least acknowledging that ‘working’ in brothels requires chemical support in order to dissociate to survive the reality of the sex-trade.

I challenge Young Labor to cite research behind their claim that decriminalising brothels results in further autonomy and protections for ‘sex workers’, and could give them the power to ‘unionise’ and ‘collectively organise’.

If Young Labor had done their homework, they would know that brothels are the means of keeping violence against ‘sex workers’ behind closed doors. Those selling sex in brothels have less negotiating power, are forced to adhere to conditions imposed by the brothel-keeper and any bargaining power becomes increasingly hypothetical, with the sex-buyer dictating with his wallet, which sex acts a woman must perform.

Young Labor’s naive assumption that ‘sex workers’ will unionise independently of third party profiteers, (male and female pimps now called ‘managers’, drivers and landlords), under the obfuscating title of the ‘operational aspects of sex work’ is staggering.

While it is already legal to buy and sell sex under Tasmanian law, extending this decriminalisation to pimping and other forms of third party profiteering leave those selling sex at high risk of imposed control, including fines for lack of adherence to clothing policy fines for tardiness, and, most obviously, having a large percentage of their income taken from them. As for other ‘protections’, in a decriminalised brothel in NZ recently, a woman who over-dosed on ‘illicit drugs’ was removed unconscious from the premises in order for the brothel not to come under scrutiny. In fact, in-house knowledge of violent assaults, theft of personal items and money from ‘sex workers’ in decriminalised brothels are rife, but hidden, both by the prostituted who fear losing their livelihoods and scoring a black mark against their name, and the brothel owners themselves.

States with decriminalised legislature are target destinations for sex-traffickers, whereas countries in which buying, pimping and procuring sex is illegal, and those selling sex are completely decriminalised themselves, such as in Sweden, are a turn-off for these same traffickers (*intercepted call via Swedish police). Increased sex-trafficking is evidenced with the international and domestic trafficking of women and girls in both decriminalised New Zealand and NSW.

Putting aside the innate horror of sex-trafficking, an influx of brothel ‘workers’ increases survival competition and women’s livelihoods are substantially reduced. Women are more vulnerable, not less, to endure added sexual violations.

While it is appreciated that this proposal comes from the ‘rank and file’ of party members, is it also understood that any advice from so called ‘sex worker organisations’ such as Scarlet Alliance, comes not from the ‘rank and file’ of the majority in the sex-trade? These are a minority of those in the sex-trade, often in positions of ‘management’ and/or wholly independent of brothel ‘work’ themselves!

Why take advice from government funded groups in these positions who also minimise the need for exiting strategies for those who want to leave prostitution?

And what ‘union’ worth it’s salt argues for a model of legislation which empowers pimps over ‘workers’?

Perhaps it is understandable that Young Labor has produced an ill conceived policy based on old notions about the politics of prohibition. After all, if high profile human rights organisations such as Amnesty International can be infiltrated by pimps, drafting it’s policy on ‘sex work’ on the basis of brothel-owner and pimp Douglas Fox in the UK, brothel owners Escort Ireland, and convicted sex-traffickers such as Eliana Gil, why wouldn’t others?

I encourage a dialogue with Young Labor as it is likely their motivation comes from an ethos of ‘worker’s rights’, but it has been misled by those with a vested interest in opening up opportunities for profiteering from brothel owners and keeping the status quo of pimps over the prostituted. As we know decriminalisation leads to an expansion of the sex-trade from which the majority simply want to get out.

One hopes in the predicted ‘spirited debate’ fiction does not obscure fact, although it seems unlikely. Meanwhile, hundreds of women are trafficked into decriminalised NSW, and a ‘sex worker’ bound and raped in legalised Victoria is remunerated with a phone and money that was stolen from her wallet (rape as theft?)- cases which the Scarlet Alliance vehemently ignore . One wonders which ‘sex workers’ are considered, by them, to be worth fighting for.

Young Labor’s challenge should be to fight the global humanitarian crisis of the 21st century, not cater to the mutli-billion dollar sex-trade and further cement in to the GDP money taxed off the bodies of the sexually exploited.

http://www.smh.com.au/nsw/trafficking-women-lured-with-student-visas-forced-into-sex-slavery-20140329-35q88.html

http://www.theage.com.au/victoria/acquitted-of-rape-real-estate-agent-henry-jiang-must-pay-for-sex-workers-broken-phone-20160426-gof3gv.html

http://www.news.com.au/national/victoria/courts-law/melbourne-sex-worker-allegedly-raped-by-client/news-story/8d060cd87fc1f453e2863492ab4f0947

http://www.austlii.edu.au/au/cases/vic/VCC/2016/494.html

http://tasmaniantimes.com/images/uploads/The_Red_Light_Report_-_NORMAC.pdf

http://researchbank.rmit.edu.au/view/rmit:31592

http://www.spinifexpress.com.au/Bookstore/book/id=285/

book PN cover

The Time That Won’t be Remembered

From Rebecca Mott XX

Rebecca Mott

To write to this blog, I must write to broke – no, smashed up memory.

To truly understand the true horror that is to be prostituted, we must stare with clear eyes into that well of despair.

To remember the realities of being prostituted is to fight wanting to block it all away.

To remember that time is to drown whilst hanging on tight to life.

No wonder to survive, memory is ripped apart.

Now is a time where I am secure and safe enough to piece together that jigsaw of remembering.

There can be no linear ways to remember – no clearness of time, place or even age that I was.

Memory of my prostituted times are inside every cell of my body.

Every day some pain remind me that my body was made into sexual goods.

Every day some pain reminds me that I lost my human rights…

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